Dear Agony
by MarMarBinks
Summary: Songfic set before the 2007 movie.  Leo and Raph have had a secret relationship for a while, and now, Leo's leaving. Peachy.  Warning: Turtlecest.  Cussing also!


**A/N: **New favorite band: Breaking Benjamin. Absolutely love them! :D My favorite song so far is Break, but this songfic will be using their song Dear Agony (Yeah it's the title..shocker). This is set before the 2007 movie. As you will later find out, Leo is telling Raph that he is going away. :( Don't go, Leo! I wuvs you!

Anyway, this is my first attempt at Turtlecest, so please help me out, but don't be too harsh!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own TMNT or the song, but I do own a computer. Now, I can watch and listen to both things nonstop XD

**Warning:** Turtlecest. Don't like, don't read. It's simple, really.

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><p>"I'm leaving."<p>

The words rung through the near silent night on the rooftop. Two mutants were the only occupants. The one with the red mask swung his head fast and stared at the one who had spoken. His question was clear on his face.

The one with a blue mask, the one who had spoken, started again, but refused to look at his companion. He kept his gaze straight ahead, at the large, bright moon. "Splinter's sending me to somewhere in Central America. He thinks that me being away from the troubles here will help me train better. To be a better leader."

The other roof inhabitant finally found his voice, "What? That's bullshit! Things were jus' beginnin' to get better. Shredder's gone. What trouble's do ya need to escape from? Things were jus' getting peaceful 'round here. This was the perfect endin' to a terrible ragin' war with an enemy who seemed undefeatable!"

**_I have nothing left to give_**

**_I have found the perfect end_**

"God, Leo!" he continued. "It's like you were made to...to hurt me! Every time things start to look up, you have to go do something to ruin it!"

_**You were made to make it hurt**_

_**Disappear into the dirt**_

_**Carry me to heaven's arms**_

_**Light the way and let me go**_

"Raph," the one called Leo pleaded, finally looking at the other being on the roof. "It's hard as it is. I'm leaving everything I know; everything I love."

"This is just..." the red one, Raph, growled. "Stupid Splinter! You train enough as it is, but now he has to send you _away_? It's bullshit and you're a dumbass for going along with it."

"I didn't just 'go along with it!'" the elder of the two exclaimed. "I asked and begged him not to make me go, but he wouldn't listen." He sighed irritably. "You think you're the only one hurting here? Cause you're not! You think I feel perfectly fine about leaving you? Well, I don't!" Looking at the moon again, he cursed silently and moved his gaze to Raph again. "I've got to go soon," he said as he began to untie his mask.

"What are ya doin'?" he asked warily, not sure what was happening.

"This." Having successfully removed it from his head, he tied it around Raph's eyes.

**_Suddenly_**

**_The lights go out_**

**_Let forever_**

**_Drag me down_**

"What the-" Raph's objection was cut short as a pair of lips crashed into his and gave him a kiss that left him breathless. All past anger was forgotten as his mouth began to work against his brother's.

**_Take the time to take my breath_**

**_I will end where I began_**

All too soon, Leo's lips removed themselves from Raph's. Heart quickening, the red clad turtle rapidly untied his brother's mask with clumsy hands. Removing it, he saw with dread that he was the only one on the roof. Spinning in a circle, he urgently searched for his brother but to no avail. Looking down at the blue strip in his hand, he was filled with agony and loss.

**_Dear agony_**

**_Just let go of me_**

**_Suffer slowly_**

**_Is this the way it has to be?_**

**_Dear agony_**

And then it began to rain. Of course it did; why wouldn't it? Raph didn't register the drops, however, as he slumped to the ground and pulled his knees to his plastron. Wrapping his arms around his knees, he rested his chin on his forearms and clutched Leo's mask close to him. Rubbing the soft fabric absentmindedly with his thumb, the red clad turtle mumbled, "God, Leo. You always knew how to make an exit."

**_Leave me alone_**

**_God let me go_**

**_I'm blue and cold_**

Raph finally acknowledged the rain when it's watery drops started to make him cold. His skin, he noticed, was more of an ocean green-blue like Mikey's than his normal forest green. Not that he cared. He could care less about his body temperature; he only cared about the loss he had just endured. It was the only thing on his mind.

**_Love pull me down_**

**_Hate lift me up_**

His secret love and hidden relationship with Leo had always brought the red clad turtle down. Despite his normal attitude of 'never show your feelings,' he had grown tired of hiding Leo's and his feelings from their family. He hated his father for being the main reason Leo insisted that they keep it secret. He also hated his father for sending his lover away from him. How could he be so heartless? Yeah, says the most cold-hearted one in their family.

**_Just turn around_**

**_There's nothing left_**

Drowning in his agony, Raph made a decision. He was going to turn away from this. He wasn't going to go through this anymore. Love in him was no more. There was none of it left.

Raph usually hated the rain, but this time, he was grateful for it. That way, if anyone _did_ see him up here, at least they wouldn't know that those were tears streaming down his face, not only rain.

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><p><strong>AN: **Not my best work, I'll admit. Too bad, you're going to ENJOY IT! Naw, you don't have to like it if you don't wanna...it would be nice though...

I though about continuing this and writing Raph and Leo's relationship throughout the movie and whatnot. What does you think?

Anyway, since it _was_ my first Turtlecest, I'd love to see how I did! Soooooooo...

REVIEW!~~~~ :D


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